Week 15, Round two

Saturday was a big day for me.  I knew that day would arrive quicker than anticipated and I knew it'd be somewhat of a determining factor--especially for my confidence going into the race.

Training for a marathon takes time and dedication.  And good running shoes.  But mostly, just time and dedication. Most training programs are 18-week programs, and two days ago was the end of my 15th week for the second time in my life.  Meaning, race day is less than three weeks away.....!

A couple posts ago I talked about how everything inside of me did not want to go for a run that day.  In the end, I ended up running the needed distance and was incredibly grateful I did.  One reason that particular run was so important was because whether I completed it or not would determine my ability to complete the long run on Saturday.  I was also sick and unable to run the week prior so I knew time to 'get my runs in' before race day was quickly diminishing--especially if I wanted to decrease my risk of injury from training too hard, too fast.  

Saturday morning came.  I woke up, ate a bagel with cream cheese, and got my 'gear' ready for my run while waiting for my food to settle.  I was preparing myself to run 20 miles, which was expected to take me 3 hours and 10 minutes, roughly.  For the run, I needed to wear a fuel belt.  The picture to the right is me and one of my friends running a half-marathon.  Looking back, we probably didn't need to wear our belts for that race...oh well.  If you can see, there is a small pouch in the center and two containers on either side.  For my Saturday run, one container was filled with water, the other with gatorade.  The tiny pouch was beyond 'stuffed to the brim' with my phone {in case of emergency}, PowerBar energy blasts,  and one Gu gel packet {the other 3 Gu gel packs were stuffed in my sportsbra}.  

I was so nervous, but excited.  To minimize insecurity and doubt for my upcoming marathon, I needed to finish this run, and preferably well. 

I wasn't in the mood to run 'out and back' this day--I needed some sort of loop.  So I found the loop of the half-marathon {pictured above} online and added an extra loop at the end to come up with the needed miles.  

My ipod was in my armband and I headed out.  I decided to not start off running to music, I needed to have a controlled, even pace and I wanted to soak up my surroundings--I was about to run through the back country of Eastern Idaho and I wanted to enjoy it.

It's an incredible thing to focus on your breathing, the sound of your shoes hitting the pavement, the wind, the occasional diesel truck or farm equipment drive by, cows mooing, and dogs barking.  I was so caught up in my surroundings and how my body felt, I didn't end up ever listening to my ipod the entire run. 

I ate my energy blasts and Gu gels on schedule: at mile 5, 10, and 16.  If I ever strongly believed in Gu gels, it was after this run.  I took the gels just before my body and muscles craved them and was glad I did.  

I only take my phone on long runs when I wear my fuel belt, but I'd never taken pictures.  This time it was so pretty I couldn't help it, and it only took a few seconds anyway.  

When I realized I was only a few miles from home, I couldn't believe it.  I was elated, and not necessarily for the reasons you would think.  Of course I was ecstatic because I was about to finish my 20-mile run and be able to eat, but more-so because I felt so good!  To my surprise, I didn't feel dead and utterly exhausted.  On the contrary, I felt like I could keep running.  I was on the biggest runner's high and I didn't want it to end.  Then for the first time in my training these last few weeks, I felt ready for March 3rd to grace me with it's presence.  The icing on the cake was when I looked at my watch and saw that I had run not 20 miles, but 21.

The only thing that could have made the experience that much better would have been to come home to my husband saying "I'm so proud of you!  I knew you could do it!" while giving me a big hug, despite the fact that I had dried, salty sweat all over my face and wreaked of someone who'd been sweating for over 3 hours straight.  But, since he was still in Reno, my dog sufficed.  And she was probably just as excited as he would've been because she got to lick my sweaty arms and legs while I stretched {what is it with dogs loving sweat?!}.  Gross.

Besides feeling hungry and sweaty when I got home, the only real pain I had was from the blisters I felt forming and rubbing in my shoes during my run.  I learned by about mile 11 that it was definitely time for new shoes, and quick.

If you haven't believed in yourself and in your ability to do more than you thought possible, start believing.  I know we can accomplish anything we're willing to put the time and effort into.  Sure it'll be hard, but man alive will it be worth it.  So give it a shot and test it out.  You got this.

This or that

Today I woke up with every intention of going on a run within the first 30-60 minutes of being awake.  Every intention.  In fact, I went to bed last night ready and actually looking forward to this run.  I'm weird right?  {At least it's a healthy type of weird}.

I woke up slow, getting up before 9am.  I was dressed in my long spandex with my Asics, all ready to go just before 10am. {Reminder: the long spandex is necessary--I live in Idaho where it is 14 degrees Fahrenheit at 10am this time of year}.  Long story short, I somehow became distracted and preoccupied with other important, as well as unimportant, things that kept me from starting my run.  

.....2:30pm rolls around and I'm finally turning on my garmin and jogging out the door.  

After a few hours of being dressed to run and still sitting on the couch, had the thought crossed my mind to not run?  Yes.  Lately, I've noticed that if my training for a marathon comes up in conversation, the persons listening assume I am above and beyond what I actually am.  Well surprise, I have my days where I would just rather get my errands and cleaning done, or lounge in my sweats instead of going for a two hour run.  Their reaction to my crave for running includes thoughts of how it 'comes natural' for me and how they could never get themselves 'to do that'.  My reaction is, why not??

I wasn't born with any supernatural power that enables me with a magical desire and capability to run long distances.  I haven't always been a 'runner'.  This desire and passion for running is a recent development, believe it or not.  And if I had to put a date on it, I'd say I didn't start to love distances greater than say, five miles, until about August 2010 {basically a year and a half ago}.  

The reason I mention this is because towards the end of my run today, I began thinking about how I could have {and almost did} chosen not to run.  It would have been easy to come up with justifications to lounge today, run tomorrow.

My point is, is that there is no reason you couldn't decide, just as I did, to use your agency and choose to 'go run' if that is what you desire.  There may be an array of other desires you have for yourself, and all I'm saying is maybe all you need to do, is decide to do it.  It seems a person's biggest limitations are the ones they place on themselves.  We have more will power than we think and we need to give ourselves more credit.  Of course, we would be nothing without God, but even He knows we have greater potential than we could imagine. 

Embrace the nike slogan already, and 'just do it' {whatever "it" may be}.

Mesa Falls Marathon

August 27, 2011.  26.2 miles.  What a day!  I was hoping to post the same day or at least the day after so everything could be extra fresh in my mind, but, here we are...3 weeks later.  Get ready for details, because well, I love details and I don't want to forget them!

The 'race' actually starts the night before, did you know?  Well, I didn't realize that until the night before. Lovely!  It includes packing and planning and eating and drinking {water} and laying out your clothes and equipment for the big run, amongst other things.  Oh and anxiety attacks.  It's not mandatory, but apparently inevitable for miss stress-ball over here {that would be me}.  

At about 7:30pm {night before race day} I realized I had been so anxious about the next morning that I had hardly eaten anything that day, including dinner.  Ideally, I would have eaten dinner between 5:30 and 6pm, then had a snack before falling asleep comfortably and soundly by 9pm because HELLO my alarm is set for 4:30am the next morning and I want to sleep fabulously before I run the farthest I've ever run in my life.  Naturally.  Is that so much to ask?  But, instead, I panic.  I frantically look through my fridge and pantry and am at a loss of what I should/could make for dinner!  I call Zuriel, explain to him my realization of how late it is and that I hadn't eaten dinner yet and blah blah blah blah... Basically the evening went down hill from there.  He quickly came home, put me in the car, and drove me somewhere to eat.  By the time we get home it is about 8:30pm.  Long story short--I don't fall asleep until after midnight.  

Now we'll skip to more happy and exciting moments.  For example, the START LINE!  Standing at the start line was in one word, surreal.  Was I really about to run a MARATHON?  And I don't feel nervous but sincerely excited?!  I couldn't believe it.  Where did my anxiety go.

The advice I heard over and over from friends, family, and random 'marathoners' was don't start out too fast!  So from the start, I did what I could to not let the excitement and adrenaline take over and push me too fast so early in the race.  I was on my 'runner's high' from mile 1, which was very convenient!  I kept thinking I was running too slow because more people than I expected were passing me.  But when I checked my trusty watch, I was always right where I wanted to be.  

I ran sans music for the first 13 miles.  I was enjoying the beautiful scenery!  A handful of runners were even running with cameras, stopping every now and then to capture the perfect picture.  

The first ten miles were on dirt roads.  We were up in the mountains, surrounded by trees.  Yet, you knew farms weren't too far off every time you heard a cow "moo" or you just barely missed the pile of poop your shoe was about to land in.  The dirt roads turned into pavement for a few miles, until just past the point where the half-marathon started.  This is where I put my headphones in.  I can't remember how desperate I began to feel for the up-beat music, but, it seemed like as good a time as ever to use the ipod!  After a few miles running on pavement, we veered off the road to begin the trail-run portion of the race.  It was awesome!  The path was only as wide as the ATV that drove on it to create the path.  The narrow path between trees almost made you forget you were racing.  Until, of course, you bumped elbows with runners wearing bib numbers as you were passing them because of how narrow the path was.  

The end of the trail run brought you to the {dreaded} beginning of a 2-mile hill.  It was at this point {the bottom of the hill} that I saw my husband with our dog, along with my best friend and her dog, screaming and cheering me on.  It was just what I needed before I ran that hill.  Not to mention she was blasting Journey from her car for motivation...it was perfect!  I glanced up at that hill, and all I saw was runners walking {or jogging slow enough that someone could walk faster than they were running}.  Not entirely encouraging, but I'll have you know that not one person passed me going up that hill.  I ran that hill for two miles, and it felt good.  By the end of the hill, I was just past the 19-mile marker.  

The remainder of the race was mostly flat or downhill-ish, but there were a few unexpected smaller hills that I wasn't mentally prepared for {where was THAT hill on the course map?? whaaa? and another one??} you get the idea... 

Almost everyone I talked to who had run a marathon told me of this huge, massive, ugly, 50-foot thick, barbed wire "wall" that I would hit or almost literally 'run into' at the 18 or 20-mile mark.  I braced myself at both those mile markers and you know what happened?  Nothin'.  I thought man, I'm good!  Kidding.  But I was honestly a teeny tiny bit surprised.  However my surprise only lasted a few more miles because just after mile marker 22, things started to get rough.  

However, it wasn't the kind of rough I was expecting.  I thought maybe, every muscle in my body would feel like it was shredding into pieces.  Maybe my legs would feel like they weighed 300lbs...each.  Unfortunately, none of the above.  I had been feeling some minor nausea, uncomfortable epigastric pain {where people feel heartburn} since around mile marker 6, but it was bearable.  Soon after mile 22 the pain and nausea became very apparent.  The LAST thing I wanted to do was vomit.  It must have been a combination of the eating a burrito salad for dinner the night before, barely getting 4 hours of sleep, the nerves, and the extreme heat that graced its presence three hours into the race {who invited you?!}.  Who knows.  The point is, I was doing everything I could {while running that is} to not spew everywhere.  Gross.  I stopped 3 times for about 15 seconds when I literally thought I couldn't hold it down any longer.  I knew that if I did throw up, I wouldn't have the energy to finish.  Luckily after some major prayers and mental motivation, I refocused all of my attention on finishing the best I could. 

       

What surprised me about the race?  Honestly truly?  I didn't think I was going to want to stop as bad as I wanted to stop those last four miles.  But I didn't quit.  I kept running and I finished strong.  This is what I had trained for.  This is what the last 5 months have revolved around--my running schedule.  This is what my friend convinced me that I was capable of doing.  She convinced me that I didn't give myself enough credit.  That I COULD do it if I worked for it.  So I did.  That's why a marathon is so 'hard' and so 'scary' to people.  Not the physical part {believe it or not}. It is a mental battle. And that is why it is so rewarding.  Because you didn't think you could do it.  Because you didn't know it was possible.  But it is.  And you CAN do it.  

It was one of the hardest but most rewarding physical and mental things I have done.  I was fighting tears as I was running towards the finish line.  The feeling of accomplishment you're rewarded with as you cross the finish line is indescribable.  I'm so blessed to have had this experience and the support I had from friends and family.  I look forward to training for my next marathon!